SWCAMBORNE

“When there is no reason to speak,

there is a reason not to speak”

David Frum

Author

A little perspective goes a long way.  The difference between First World Problems and Third World Problems is best illustrated by some examples:

“I don’t like the taste of this dessert.” is a first world problem.

“My children are going to bed hungry.” is a third world problem.

“The mailman is late today.” is a first world problem.

“Traffic was so bad it took us an extra half hour to get there.”  is a first world problem.

“It’s cold and I don’t own a coat.” is a third world problem.

“Do these shoes go with this outfit?”is a first world problem.

“Is the river water safe to drink?” is a third world problem.

“Should I walk four hours to town to see the doctor about this sore?” is a third world problem.

“The parking places near my Starbucks are too small.”

So folks, when you think you have a problem I suggest that you apply the “First World Test”.  Ask: “Is this a First World Problem?” and if it is smile and appreciate the blessings you have.

Thanks to the reinvented Shelly Freedenthal for teaching me about this simple test.  You are a great teacher.

The Revolutionary War was over and General Washington called the troops together to address them saying: “Men, the country must be kept safe. Accordingly, I am ordering that the active duty regulars are to stand duty from Monday through Friday. On Saturday and Sunday the National Guard and Reserves will worry about our new nations security.”

And so it was, and from that day to this, the National Guard and Reserves have been known as Weekend Worriers.

Bonus Pun:  

All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

“Attracts up to 2X MORE Colorful birds!”

In this absurd claim are they referring to quantity or colorfulness?

“You will be civilized on the day you can spend a long period of time doing nothing, learning nothing, and improving nothing, without feeling the slightest amount of guilt.”

Nassim Taleb

The Bed of Procrustes: Philosophical and Practical Aphorisms

Nassim Taleb is a writer and thinker.  He grew up in Lebanon and grew rich in the USA.  He is the author of among other books, The Black Swan.  He recently created the concept of the Antifragile and wrote a book about it.

There are more than ten million upper middle class families in the USA.  These are people who can afford gardeners, housekeepers, and pool services.  They could also afford patio maintenance services, but nobody is offering it yet.

You can fill this niche. Joe’s Patio Service (working name) would operate like a gardening service.  For a monthly fee Joe and his crew will come to our house clean the deck and the barbeque.  They will clean and refresh the patio furniture and do small repairs to the umbrellas and chairs etc.  They will even water and prune the potted plants.   Each spring (for an additional fee) they will get out your equipment and get it organized and in the fall they will stow it for you.  There is off-site storage available for your cushions etc if you don’t have a place to store them.

This is a perfect business for a young person who lives in or near an affluent area.  Get a flyer and leaflet the neighborhood and then do a good job and referrals will keep you busy for ever.

Franchising Opportunities?

“If there were not already a Post Office, nobody would bother to invent it.”

Kevin Williamson

National Review

The First Night of Hanukkah will be on Thanksgiving this Year.


This has never happened before.


Thanksgiving is set as the fourth Thursday in November, meaning the latest it can be is 11/28. 11/28 is also the earliest Hanukkah can be.
The Jewish calendar repeats on a 19 year cycle, and Thanksgiving 
repeats on a 7 year cycle. You would therefore expect them to coincide
 roughly every 19×7 = 133 years. Looking back, this is approximately
 correct – the last time it would have happened is 1861. However,
 Thanksgiving was only formally established by President Lincoln in
1863. So, it has never happened before.



Why won’t it ever happen again?


The reason is because the Jewish calendar is very slowly getting out of sync with the solar calendar, at a rate of 4 days per 1000 years.
This means that while presently Hanukkah can be as early as 11/28, 
over the years the calendar will drift forward, such that the earliest
 Hanukkah can be is 11/29. The next time Hanukkah falls on 11/28 is 
2146, which is a Monday. Therefore, 2013 is the only time Hanukkah 
will ever overlap with Thanksgiving.  

Of course, if the Jewish calendar is never modified in any way, then it will slowly move forward through the Gregorian calendar, until it
 loops all the way back to where it is now. So, Hanukkah would again 
fall on Thursday, 11/28…in the year 79,811. Given our trajectory it is fair to say humans won’t be here then. And
 if there are no humans, the holidays will be cancelled.



So on November 28th 2013, enjoy your turkey and your latkes. It has
 never happened before, and it will never happen again.

An abbey was in financial difficulties, and to increase its income the brothers decide to open a fish and chips business.

One day the abbey door bell rang and one of the brothers went to welcome a customer.

When he opened the door the customer said, “Are you the fish fryer?”

The brother said, “No, I’m the chip monk.”

Bonus Pun:

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.