SWCAMBORNE

 Free postcards of the
food usually indicate
the marketing department
can’t find a view. 

The life of the pond has been well chronicled on this blog.  Including the Heron, Frogs, a special needs fish and Koimageddon.  But this bears swim was, I believe, the most amazing event yet.

A sailor was caught AWOL as he tried to sneak on board his ship at about 3 am. The chief petty officer spied him and ordered the sailor to stop. The officer ordered the sailor, “Take this broom and sweep every link on this anchor chain by morning or it’s the brig for you!”

The sailor picked up the broom and started to sweep the chain.

Just then, a tern landed on the broom handle. The sailor yelled at the bird to leave, but it didn’t. The lad picked the tern off the broom handle, giving the bird a toss.

The bird left, only to return and light once again on the broom handle. The sailor went through the same routine all over again, with the same result.

He couldn’t get any cleaning done because he could only sweep at the chain once or twice before the silly bird came back.

When morning came, so did the chief petty officer, to check up on his wayward sailor.

“What on earth have you been doing all night? This chain is no cleaner than when you started! What have you to say for yourself, sailor?” barked the chief.

“Honest, chief,” came the reply, “I tossed a tern all night and couldn’t sweep a link!”

Bonus Pun:

PMS jokes aren’t funny; period.

I wonder if “Missing Management” knows

why they aren’t getting any English clients?

“Flattery is the lubricating oil of life.”

from  Catherine the Great

by Robert Massie

A young man had been working as a bag boy in a supermarket for several years.

One day the supermarket got new orange juice machines.

The bag boy was excited and asked the manager if he could work the juice machines.

The manager turned him down.

The bag boy said, “But I’ve been working here for five years. Why can’t I run the juice machines?”

The manager said, “I’m sorry, but baggers can’t be juicers.”

Bonus Pun:

I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

“Free with donation”

sounds like tax evasion to me.

“Salve lucrum! Lucrum gaudium!”

“Hail profit! Profit is joy!”

Roman saying discovered at Pompeii

From Pompeii

a novel by Robert Harris